speechless

I 'll never talk again ohhhh
And I'll never love again ohhh
I'll never write a song won't even sing along.. You've left me speechless ohhh.


This song really hits me.. I just wanna shut my mouth and just watch them come and go..
I dont understand myself but life goes on and if he's not for me then i'll let go and walk away.. (hala ka.emo ani uit.. haha nahimuot ko sa ako self.. "LAHI RA JUD NI!" haha)

so i got home from Samal.. Very stressful pero enjoy au... :) I had so much fun with all the participant from our school :)

isa ka pangutana siguro na nasa inyo mind karon kung nganong nag.emote ko well, ang ako lng matubag.. " Lahi ra jud ning nafefeel nako" haha lol..

excited...!!!

oh my god.. i am so excited about the Regional STEP...

We are going to Samal!! i cant wait!!!

So i practiced for a couple of days and you know.. opened my facebook sometimes hehe (sorry sir hangad i cant stop myself)

Its almost competition day and i cant feel anything.. i am afraid that i would feel the fear of loosing hours before the competition because you know me, when i am scared, it takes a lot of guts for me to stand back again.. whoo but i can do this.. i am contented of what i reached,... if i loose then better luck next time at least i was able to be part of the regional step skills competition and i had fun while practicing with my other players.. :)


GOOD LUCK TO US ALL!!!!

i know... but...

ok.. so yeah.. i know i am harsh to him.. not talking to him and stuff but hey, i know even you will not talk to him if every time you both talk, you just repeat everything u said during your last conversation

I know i am over acting when in times that he wants to talk but you people just dont understand how it feels.. i hope you take over my place and lets see if you wouldnt feel the same way..

I know I AM HARSH but u dot understand!!!!!

the day i took a load off...

after weeks of stressful jobs.. i took a load off and went to the pool with some of my friends...
Though some of friends didn't go with me cuz they went to practice for the cheer dance, i still tried to enjoy the day and i did.. it was so fun... :)

Tomorrow, i am planning to join in the practice for the cheer dance but i am afraid..:(

hmm i have nothing more to say.. ohh wait!! i created a new account so please add it :)

i dont believe in fairy tales anymore T_T

when i was young, i always get excited when my mom comes home with a new CD of fairy tales like snow white, beauty and the beast and many more.. and i always see a happy ending at the last part of the story.. the question is... "Will I have a happy ending too?" "Can i have the man of my dreams?"

hmm well, right now, i would say no... Every thing in that story is a lie.. You cant have the man you desire.. it only happens when that man will love you back... I wish i never saw those films.. so now, i wouldn't be feeling this way.. i wouldn't be weeping just because of some guy...

I wish i never new there were fairy tales cuz they corrupted my mind about happy endings, true love, get what u desire.. owww S^&T!!! why did i believe in such b*$^^s*@^!!!

I DONT BELIEVE IN FAIRY TALES ANYMORE!!

truth or consequence

Hmmm for days i've been at home.. trying to pull my self out of my boredom room..


Ive gone to the mall, gone to school, eaten so much and yet i am still bored.. now i am here at school trying to excite myself in lessons but hmm still boring.. i am now typing this stupid post in my blog while i am supposed to be studying.. whoooo..


such a stressful life... Ill be making some moves so my parents will feel what i want them to feel.. truth or consequence,, this simply means,,, you better start telling me the truth or i will start killing you slowly you F&^%$*^     #s$%^&#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hmmm funny, but history truly repeats itself...

I know what your thinking.. this is tooo personal but hey.. this is quite real..

I was talking with some of my friends about you know.. personal stuff.. hahaa (LOL)
Then in came to the point where my "life" was the topic.. oh God thank you for making me strong!!..
After that stressful conversation about my very unsuccessful life, We then went to our house...

Hmmm.. AWKWARD!!!!!! hahaha I love that word.. hahah thats what i felt after a couple of seconds... ahhaha i've never felt so awkward in my life.! ahaha.. but then again, i was able to overcome such unhappy moment...

I was thinking by myself after my friends went home and i realize.. (i told one of my friends about this) THAT HISTORY REPEATED ITSELF.... whooo.. wow! who couldve known that my previous experience would be his current experience... I thought i was the only one foolish about that LojknOhihVghgvEhh thing.. but hey.. i guess he is too.. maybe not so major like mine but.. still.. i'm so sorry..

I never thought that I was a big deal to him.. I thought.. hmm how dumb of me..!! Foolish me.. But i dont want to go back.. I' sorry I dont know how to walk backwards.. i just want to move forward.. SORRY...

A little privacy please??

hmm the day started fine.. All was well and some of my friends sent me a text message last night to go to the dance practice.. haha I was the first one to be at the practice venue... My group mates were still not there so i made friends with the guards at the venue..It was so much fun talking to them...

And then my group mates arrived at the venue... we were less than half of the group so we decided to go to the house and plan for the dance choreography... I had so much fun with my friends though presence of some made it awkward for me to move too much.. :( (im sorry about this.. but this is what i feel right now)

After all that, I downloaded some songs and here i am now.. typing what happened today


till next post!!

sem break!!

The best week of the year!!! sem break!!

After weeks of frustration and stressful projects, i now have a stress-free and all-day-sleep week..

Yesterday, i was with my lil'bro to his field trip and man was it fun...

First they went to the science centrum.. well, the machines there were not new to me but it was still fun,..

next we went to the Philippine eagle... Who could've known that monkeys were sooo cute... and dont forget about the very photogenic eagle named ALEX..

Lastly we went to the mall... Me, my lil'bro and my cousin played at the 4th floor of SM and it was sooo fun... We tried to get a stuffed toy from the crate machine but sadly, out of luck..

I'll be uploading pics of our adventure at my face book account so better check it out.. hahah see yah!!

confused..''

Despite all those sufferings and hurtful things that happened in my life, i will still smile and be happy 

OK.. so i was planning to type a new and more interesting post today...
I was typing a lot of titles and i came up of putting just one word for the title and my title today is "confused"..


Why confused??? well.... these past few days..I've been thinking about things that i don't tell my friends...
After days of thinking, i came to the conclusion that i really don't fit in.. hm... i fell that i am always out of place.. I feel like i live in a world where i wasn't supposed to be.. Like it was a mistake that i am here..


hm i know my Father, our God, never does any mistake but why do i feel like this?? 
Maybe its just me.. Maybe its my mistake.. maybe i DON'T want to be here.. or something like that..


I like my friends.. but why is this feeling of out of place.. hunting me,...Its trying to convince me to go.. to go to a place where i will feel more accepted and where i will feel that i belong..


I just wish this feeling would change cuz if it wont, I don't know what will happen next..


Until next blog!!

just be yourself???

Today is the day of our examination... 
Last night, I slept probably at 12 or 1 am..
Frustrated, I took a bath and tried to absorb the words in the reviewer so that there would be a chance that i can pass the test... Some of the words were sucked into my brain but many did not.. I was so bothered by other things that i wasnt able to concentrate in studying..


So here i am now.. typing my post about being myself... why?


This is the whole story..


Last night.. my groupmates went to my classmates house to do our thesis.. I told them before i went home that i will attend to the making of our thesis so i asked my nanny to help me tell my dad...she said that it was too late and my dad would freak out... with the guts in me.. i went to the door and shivered.. i asked nanny to text a friend that was there in the making .. the text said that i cant go so if possible, they can give me somthing i could do...no reply.. i waited untill almost 1 am for anyone from my group going online.. but there was none so i went to sleep




and here i am now at school... trying to convince myself to be just me..... 


I even posted at my notes that:


Dont try to fit in...
 just be yourself.. even if it is hard to be out of place, atleast you will never have any doubts :)


i guess this is right but its very hard to feel that your out of place... its so confusing...


I guess i just gotta go with the flow of life and move on...




Until my next blog!!! (i hope i will pass the exam *fingers crossed*) 

Boy,You gotta let go

My day started a little fuzzy..I felt like i was going to do the worst thing i could do in my life but I was so desperate that i didn't think of any doubt and walked out the door saying goodbye to my parents, my brother and everyone inside our home...

So i step foot into the room.. but no one alarming was in sight so i attended to other matters... And then something.. maybe someone alarmed me and i began to keep quiet... Knowing that we will take a review of the first subject, i let the nervousness occupy my mind..

Before I arrived at the school, i already notified him about the news.. and i didn't receive any reply.. so i didn't bother..

After the test and after a couple of hours.. he called me.. explaining and asking me about things.. I answer but he wanted me to elaborate more.. He keeps asking and asking and i keep on answering him with the same answer...

And today it ends.. and a new life starts..... i don't want to have any regrets..

Maybe he is right.. that i don't care with others feelings (or something like that) ... or i change.. hmm .. i don't know..

what i know now... is that no relationship will work out for me so better not expose myself to those stuff!!!

Ahahahahhahaha......

me...me...me...

so who am i? 

Well... i am a very simple girl.. 

what i want is only respect from other people.

I know that respect is something you dont ask for but what u earn.. 

But let me ask you a question,,, if u respect a person, is that person obliged to respect u too..

lets just leave that question behind and start in getting to know me :)

Personal info

name: A R Timogtimog

Online name: Mikon Houganteki/ Arisa Takemoto/ Caroline Simone Montegue

age: 14

address: Somewhere in the lovely Philippines

Zodiac sign: Pisces

Mothers name:-- Arceli 

Fathers name: --Raul

siblings: (only 1)-- Zoe (boy)

contact details:

--online accounts--

-----facebook: ar_angelique@yahoo.com

-----yahoo: ar_angelique@yahoo.com

-----friendster.com: ar_prs@ymail.com

-----tagged: ar_angelique@yahoo.com

-----twitter: ar_angelique@yahoo.com (mz_sacrifice)

-----perf: ar_angelique@yahoo.com

contact numbers:

--cellphone: +639397642393

MY faves!!!!!!!

--colors: pink, sky blue, black, lavender, red,...

--animals: snake, dog, cat, rabbit :)

--food: everything that has chocolate and everything thats sweet

--to do: composing, singing, talking with friends, spending time alone.. :)

This is everything about me but if u want to know me better then might as well talk with me personally :) i am very approachable :)

till next post!!

Expressing yourself

There are so many ways to express what you feel. There's talking to your friends and writing what you feel in a diary. Well for me, writing songs are the best way to let my feelings flow out of me and be heard by everyone else. Singing makes me feel appreciated and makes me feel a bit more lighter because i can sing what i feel and i can express my anger, love, happiness and all other emotion that i feel.

here are some of my composed song that i really like:

from time to time

The first time I saw your face all I saw was an angel..

The first time we talked, was the time I got addicted

Your smile lights up my day.. Your like the air I breath oh this I cant take..

chorus:

U r  shoulder is where I want to cry..

Ur the pillow where  I want to rest for a while

You  are  the apple of my eye

And you’re the star who lights up my sky

The second time I saw your face was the time you looked back at me

The second time we talked was the time u said to me

That if possible you could hold my hand and I said that

 Repeat chorus

Now that we are now together, My heart is beating so fast and I cant stop my self from saying..

With you I don’t need to cry..

When I’m with you, I don’t wanna rest,, just wanna be with you every time..

Truly connected.. Your eyes and mine

With you, our light soon covers the sky..

Please be with me tonight..

Our love can light up the sky

Fantasy to reality

When I met this guy through the boulevard,

A certain feeling grew; I don’t know what it was

I like his attitude, especially his smile but I know that… he is not mine,

Chorus:

I wish that you and me are together

In my dreams, I love you more than ever.

Cuz every time I close my eyes, you hold me in your arms,

I wish that this would never end but in reality,,, You’re not mine

You put a smile on my face whenever you joke around

I hop my dreams wont fall to the ground

I hope ill stay forever in this cloud

But I know in my mind that your not mine but

Repeat chorus

Didn’t expect my dreams would come true, what you said to me took away all my blues

You took my hand and said…

And now that you and me are together

Not only in dreams that I love u more than ever

And now every time I close my eyes, you hold me in your arms,, I know that this would never end cuz now in reality, Your now mine..

Checkered

What is this feeling that I feel inside

You’re always on my mind

I remember you every night

We have so much in common

Our eyes and our mind

But everybody tease us so I cant hold u tight I wanna tell you that

Chorus:

I love you you’ll always be in mind

I’ll stay with you everyday and night

What I’m feeling I have no clue but I’ll always say that... ILOVE YOU

You’re the only one I see when I’m sitting on my seat

You’re like an angel that GOD has given me

Your Chinese eyes sparkle against the shiny sun

It completes my day...

Oh what fun... I wanna tell you that

Repeat chorus..

I really want to say what’s bon my mind

I cant hold it much longer now its time to say that

Repeat chorus..