i surrender Father... T_T

hmm... crying again.. stupid me!!

But then again at least now i know why people always say that pride is very dangerous...
My pride has cost a lot... My pride was the reason i suffer...
My pride is the reason why i look so stupid right now..

Im tired of being so stupid about stuff that i am good at when its about other people..
How could i give them wonderful advises and not fix mine?
I guess i was wrong in some stuff... and yeah i regret some of it.. but my pride tells me to just go on and let go.. even how hard it is.. just go... even tears overflow let go... maybe someday when i am not holding ur hand anymore... God will fill the spaces instead of you..

Its stupid how i manage to smile when im sad, to laugh when inside i am crying.. to rejoice when everybody knows im weeping..

I know i am doing the wrong thing.. but its better this way isn't it? I've always done this kind of thing for many times so its really not new to me but yeah i admit it kinda has a different and more painful impact but duh... i can handle this .. ^^

I know Father will be there for me always.. He will help me... I surrender my life to you Father...